Man I love The Onion


This is just another reason to love The Onion (and an excellent companion to the previous report on one man’s futile attempts to negotiate with the influential Attractive Girls Union). The spokeswoman for Girlfriends of America says their economic stimulus plan will save the nation’s couples billions. “In a recession, it just doesn’t make sense for two people who say they love each other to pay two separate rents.” But The American Boyfriend Federation isn’t sure and has offered a competing plan to slash spending:

  • Cancel subscription to vegetarian cooking magazien
  • Get normal soap
  • Give up the cat
  • Girlfriends’ lawyer friends are nice and all, but maybe we could not go out with them every weekend, since they always want to do something expensive. That’s the only reason.
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